I DID IT!!!! (kinda...?)

So before my last paper which was H2 Chem paper 1(MCQ), I wrote a post on Managing A levels , and in there I shared about my own experience and provided info on my own performance for you guys to have a rough gauge. Actually, it is mainly targeted at students, who like me, have always been a "there but not quite there" student, i.e. the average student. We don't perform badly, but our results are nothing to boast of as well.

And so, I got my results on Friday...and........

Well the title kinda gave it away already right? I obviously must have done not bad, or maybe even well. So yeah, I got 6As and 1B, taking 4 H2s.

I was honestly just relieved when I first got to know my results. In fact, I didn't join the rest of the cohort in receiving my results. Yeah, call me a coward, but you would probably understand if you knew how it works in my school.

So everybody will gather at the hall, and at the time for official release, the principal will announce how the school did overall, moving on to the various subjects, comparing the A rate within the school and to national. After that, they will call out the names of all who got 6As and above. Ok, so imagine if you were one of those who did not get 6 As or above. You don't know how you did. 5 or 4 As would still be okay, even 3. But 2 and below? I don't know about you but I would start getting worried. And it's precisely this uncertainty that I wanted to avoid. The unknown of what you got ould be enough to drive anyone nuts.

And so I deliberately applied for only a half-day leave from my internship, and even joined my team at Paypal for a lunch treat by the senior manager(come on who will wanna miss a free treat??) which resulted in my only leaving at 2. And then even when my parents came to fetch me and we reached the school, I had to scream(I know, it's rude) at my father to not alight me just yet.

I was very scared. Really. All I could think about was holding my result slip and not being able to find the highly coveted letter 'A'. And it was made worse when I saw my fellow schoolmates who have already taken their results and were lounging or crying by the corridors. In the end I was thinking I should just wait till most of the people have left.

My friend went for the whole process though, and she was the one who texted me to let me know I got 6As. Before that I was sitting in the car at my school's parking area, refusing to go up.

Naturally, I was happy and relieved. I didn't have to change any plans, I could go forward as planned. That is applying for Accountancy, the various programmes, and even going for law. At the same time I am eligible for several scholarships, so its really no harm trying.

And I walked into the hall with my head held high. I still remember the smirk on my face when my teacher ask my mom how her daughter did. My mom proudly said 6As, and he was all "wow that's really good, who is she?" And lo and behold its me.

I am not happy because I did better than others. I am happy because I proved them wrong, once again, just like how I proved my teachers and friends wrong in PSLE.

As a "there but not quite there" student, we are often the neglected bunch. Teachers know we will do well enough to survive, and so they don't care about us. They also think that we aren't that amazing anyway, so they don't need to care about us.

And so comes the insane satisfaction of slapping them in their faces with your result slip.

Perhaps it's just my frustration and dissatisfaction with the highly elitist society.

But.....(this may be offensive to those who didn't do as well) I started doubting how well I actually did. In other words, in my mind, I was thinking: is 6As really that good?

This isn't just me aiming for more since I got something good already. But really, its because the cohort has been doing better and better at every A level examination. 6As is no longer that big a thing. In fact, I believe at least 10% of the cohort for 2015 got 6As and above.

Regardless of how I did compared to the entire cohort, 6As was my original goal, and I got it. It is a cause for celebration, no matter what.

Honestly, who cares how you've been performing all the while from sec 1 till O levels till Prelims. As long as you can get the As in A levels, that's all that matters.