I dislike camps. There I said it. I truly dislike camps. I don't hate them, but really, my worst behaviour is on show during camps.
Chill, I don't mean I become an ultimate bitch that complains till no end. That goes on silently, unnoticed in my brain. I just mean that my introvert self is completely out and about during camps.
Why is that so? Some may ask. Well, I came to this conclusion after chatting with a fellow camp mate that thought the same way as I do: it's because that for some people like us, we can be all high and enthusiastic on the first day. But then we'll need to take a break from the world and hide to heal before we are ready to meet the world again. Unfortunately, camps normally mean that you expose this side of yourself to your camp mates as well. If I'm with people I'm close to, they understand my need to recover silently, and hence I can freely retreat and emerge out of my zone without feeling awkward. The true problem comes when I'm with people I'm not so close with, like during orientation camps, when you are most probably grouped with strangers. After showing my quiet side, I just don't have the drive to get high anymore. And by then I, and the rest who are similar to myself, will most probably be labelled the "quiet one" already, even though people who know us, and even ourselves know it's a big fat LIE .
And so, camp becomes this tiring process of preventing our introverted side from showing itself too much. This often means being constantly outgoing, which is like the ultimate killer for me, unless I'm high on alcohol, lack of sleep or drugs(never tried this before though).
That being said, camps are still fun to a certain extent. You get to meet new people, find new friends, learn new cultures, and basically step out of your comfort zone.
I actually just finished a camp at NUS, and am going for another one soon, like tomorrow (and it's at moments like this that we ask ourselves: what the freak were we thinking). It was fun, I met people that I never had the chance to in my past 18 years of life. But there was this culture shock as well, I guess. Particularly for me.
Now, I feel like I have always been living a rather.....shelled life, meaning I never really got the opportunity to meet different types of people that aren't like me. Oh man, how to put this nicely. Ok so let's just say that I have somehow always been around people who are academically strongm obedient children. I was in a pretty good primary school, in the top class, in the IP programme in secondary school, in the top class in JC. And even though I joined committees outside of school, the people there somehow also hail from good schools, good backgrounds, leading an obedient life.
So imagine the shock when the people in my camp group drank for all the nights straight during the camp. Right from the first night man, it was drinking session already, at 2 am in the morning.
It isn't a bad thing, I'm not saying that I dislike such behaviour and think it is bad. I'm simply not used to it. I do appreciate the exposure, as it's always interesting to find out about other ways of life.
Ok, enough with the rant. Yes, if you haven't realised, it's a rant. I guess what's important is to hold the correct mindset when joining new stuff. That is to be open, but firm with your own personal believes. I guess that's my mistake in my first camp, being too resistant to the exposure. Right now, I'm just going to go into my second camp with an open mind, ready to try new things and meet new people.
University life is bound to be a change for anyone, from any walk of life. I am excited for this change, yet eager for things to settle down into a nice momentum. While I'm hasty for certain things to happen, I'm going to cultivate my patience and simply enjoy the process, while still doing well enough to maintain my scholarship. All the best to me!
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